We Need Autism Awareness and Acceptance

Understanding autism better can lead to more acceptance and a better future for autistic people

April is officially Autism Awareness Month, which is supposed to help raise awareness of those diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder. However, there are some autistic people who don’t like the use of the word “awareness”, thinking that it stigmatizes autistic individuals by making it seem like a condition people ought to be fearful of and doesn’t make others think beyond the autism diagnosis. Instead, they prefer referring to the occasion as Autism Acceptance Month, which they feel helps people move beyond awareness towards a more welcoming attitude of autistic people by emphasizing understanding and inclusion.

If you look into how autism was often viewed in the past, when there was a lot of talk of how once healthy babies seemed to suddenly develop autism symptoms, how such conditions prevented kids from living normal lives, and questions about what caused it and if it could be cured, it’s understandable that many autistic people prefer to focusing on acceptance of our disability rather than awareness. Even recently, with comments from newly appointed Health and Human Services Secretary Robert Kennedy Jr. referring to autism as an “epidemic” and emphasizing the many things autistic people are often believed to be incapable of achieving, there are still many who still hold outdated or outright ignorant views of autism. In such cases, we really do need more acceptance of autism overall.

However, as an autistic person, I think that because autism impacts individuals in ways which people don’t always seem to understand, causing them to view autism in a rather stereotypical manner, we still need to talk about autism awareness, but in a way that helps people learn to accept our condition rather than fear it.

I still remember the first time I told one of my friends that I was on the autism spectrum back when I was in high school. This was a girl who was in special education because of a learning disability who also happened to have a brother that was autistic. When I told her that this was my diagnosis, she told me that when comparing me to her brother, who was more severely impacted by autism, she didn’t think that I was autistic. It may seem odd to some people that someone growing up with an autistic sibling would say this to me, but I can understand why this happens: people are sometimes taught to believe that autism always impacts people in certain ways only, and if such traits can’t be easily detected, then that person can’t really be autistic.

Such “traits” may involve having speech delays, intellectual disabilities, always looking awkward in public with habits like finger flapping or making eye contact, not understanding emotions, being incapable of socializing normally, or having narrow interests in math, the sciences, or technology. While some traits may be present in certain autistic people, it is a mistake to believe that every person on the autism spectrum has such traits.

One common misconception about autism is that it’s a “male condition”, due to how autistic men and boys often struggle with connecting socially with others, thinking creatively or using language properly, behave very aggressively when frustrated, and have restrictive interests. These are traits that are often associated with the learning problems boys might have, and because of this, boys were more likely to be diagnosed with autism than girls.

However, recently there’s been more awareness of how autism symptoms can manifest differently in women than in men. For instance, despite their social struggles, autistic women might still have an easier time with social interactions than autistic men do, causing them to sometimes have a few friends or acquaintances who might help them better understand certain social norms. They might find themselves imitating their behaviors to come as being more normal, behavior which is referred to as “camouflaging” or “masking”. Likewise, the special interests of women are more likely to include a wide range of subjects and are often considered typical interests, like reading or art rather than more stereotypical male interests like trains or dinosaurs. Also, repetitive behaviors within autistic women could take the form of restricted dietary preferences (as is sometimes the case with men) and perfectionist tendencies, such as always wanting to be the best at what they do or wanting to keep everything tidy and clean.

But unfortunately, not everyone seems to understand such things, resulting in an increase in women being diagnosed with autism as adults in recent years. Because I had problems within my family growing up, I received more attention for my condition than I probably would have otherwise, or else I would have probably been among the many women seeking a diagnosis. I’ve heard of cases where a child wasn’t given a diagnosis because they showed signs of having plenty of imagination or they liked playing with toys. And some still think that a lack of empathy or understanding of emotion is a key characteristic of autism, and that if a person does show even small signs of this, then they aren’t truly autistic. Such kids probably didn’t get the support they needed early on, which could have led to problems with socializing, learning, or adapting to certain situations as they grew up, or they might have been misdiagnosed with another condition and given treatments that weren’t appropriate for their situations, leading to more struggles.

The best thing those of you who aren’t autistic should do is someone tells you they’re autistic is to listen closely when they tell you about their condition and how it impacts them. It may not completely align with your preconceived ideas about autism, but that’s how it is with many autistic individuals. Don’t do what my friend once did and tell them that they don’t seem autistic to you, or that you have doubts about what they’re capable of doing as an autistic person. However, do let them know that you’re willing to listen to anything they tell you about their condition and that if there’s any way in which you can help them out, you’ll do it. However, do keep mind that it’s best to offer them help if they ask for your assistance first rather than just offering it every time they appear to be struggling with something. Listening first and then asking questions is probably the best way to show support to friends and family members that are autistic.

And if you yourself are autistic, remember that your point of view always matters and that you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect whenever you open up to others about being autistic. At the same time, be sure to still be open to listening to different autistic people’s experiences. Not everyone has the same strengths and weaknesses as you might have and believing that everyone does could lead to us to develop internalized ableism and not accept others or ourselves. Everyone’s experiences with autism matter.

Having both awareness and acceptance of autism is the best way in which we can help autistic people make it in our society. It is not an epidemic or something which only exists in one unambiguous way, but rather a complex condition which certain individuals have probably always had, and autistic people deserve to be understood and accepted just as much as anyone else.